Watt Report: Jar Jar's Dark Truth

Jeremy Watt
March 20, 2023, 2:01 p.m.
Posted in Watt Report

Hello Greasy Grizzly readers, this is Jeremy Watt. For this weeks Watt Report I will be discussing something that has been bothering me for a long time now: Jar Jar Binks.

First, I feel it is necessary to cover Jar Jar Binks’ use of mind control. Mind control is a technique only ever used by the Jedi and the Sith, which allows them to read and influence weak minds. The use of mind control is often accompanied by a wave of the hand. In the very first movie a Stormtrooper stops both Obi-Wan and Luke for a security check. Obi-Wan simply waves his hand, making the stormtrooper completely change his mind. If you saw the prequel movies you should know that Jar Jar uses mind control too.

If you pay close attention, you can see that Jar Jar waves his hand every time he gets a promotion in the government. It all starts when Boss Nass promotes him to Gungan General. Boss Nass had banished Jar Jar indefinitely in the past: Nobody would expect him to be promoted. However, Jar Jar waves his hand towards Boss Nass to enact classic mind control.

Furthermore, Jar Jar is promoted to senator after acting clumsy the entire movie. This makes little sense, as nobody in their right mind would think to make him an important piece of the government. Luckily, a wave of his hand allows him to secure the promotion. This alone is enough proof to justify that Jar Jar is a force user, since adequate skill in the force is required to use mind control.

I am sure you know by now that Palpatine is actually one of the most famous Sith, responsible for Killing all of the Jedi and bringing the galaxy into an age of despair. Or at least that's what you thought. The only reason Palpatine could pass his order to kill the Jedi was because he had emergency powers, given to him by none other than Jar Jar Birks. This fact is often overlooked by most Jar Jar haters, but there should be no controversy here. You can plainly see Jar Jar announce he is giving Palpatine the powers right at the end of Attack Of The Clones. Jar Jar was the one who killed all of the Jedi, which was likely his plan all along when he used mind control in order to become senator.

There is even a deleted scene in Revenge of the Sith where Palpatine thanks Jar Jar for his actions. Ahmed Best, the actor who played Jar Jar, describes this scene as "really dark" and that it "shows the evolution of Jar Jar from this fun-loving kid's character into this manipulated politician”. Likely, George Lucas decided against including the scene because Jar Jar was never displayed to the public as evil, so it would be pointless to completely change his character in the last half hour. While this deleted scene is technically not confirmed as real, it still raises some questions.

At this point the haters are probably saying that Jar Jar is still too clumsy to be a sith. Well, the truth is that he hardly ever acts clumsy. I should start by pointing out that Jar Jar is the only character who can jump really high other than Jedi and Sith. Many haters believe that Jar Jar's extreme agility is a common trait of his race, but not a single gungan other than Jar Jar is ever seen jumping high or being agile. If all gungans are agile, you would ‘expect them to use some of this agility during the giant war they had to fight in. By the way, jumping high is not the only move Jar Jar knows. Most of Jar Jar's clumsiness is actually an advanced fighting style known as Zui Quan, or "Drunken Fist Wushu".

If you watch a clip of Jar Jar and someone practicing Zui Quan side by side, you can hardly tell the difference. Some of Jar Jar's moves include "sloshing", "kipping-up, and "sweepingthe leg". I shouldnt forget to mention that when Jar Jar sweeps the leg in the first film he ends up killing three droids. He does this by shooting a dead droid's gun (still in the droid's hands) using nothing but his foot. There is no way that Jar Jar could kill three droids by accident; he was clearly using the force.

A final supporting fact is that Jed and Sith combat is already heavily based on martial arts, so Zui Quan definitely isn't a stretch. If Jar Jar can do all these advanced moves, he obviously isnt clumsy; he just pretends he is to hide his true identity.

There is yet another odd scene in the Phantom Menace. When Obi-Wan and Qui Gon see some droids, they jump off a balcony to pursue. While this happens Jar Jar Binks can be seen “slipping” and hanging off the edge of a balcony. Most people simply excuse this as another account of Jar Jars clumsiness, but it is actually evidence hiding in plain sight. Initially, Jar Jar hangs off the right side of the balcony, but when the camera cuts, you can see that he lands on the left side. Haters will say this is simply a mistake in animation, but that can not be the case.

If you watch the clip of Jar Jar landing carefully, preferably in slow motion, you can see that some droids on the right (facing Jar Jar, left from your view) are locking up towards where Jar Jar was originally hanging, and even fire some lasers. Then when Jar Jar lands, the droids turn their heads following Jar Jar towards his new landing spot. This proves that they made Jar Jar change location on purpose, since the droids are completely animated. This movie was made in the nineties, but even today moving the droids heads and firing lasers would be tedious work which nobody could possibly do by accident.

A maneuver like Jar Jar's has even been seen before, both in Return of the Jedi and The Phantom Menace. In Return of the Jedi, Jabba the Hut's henchmen are pushing Luke off of a diving board, but then Luke hangs off the edge and springs himself up. In the Phantom Menace, Obi-Wan does the same thing when he springs himself up and kills Darth Maul. This is almost exactly what Jar Jar seems to have done, hanging off the balcony, then springing himself to the ground on the opposite side in order to avoid the bullets. If Jar Jar isn't able to use the force, there is no way he would be able complete a jump only ever seen by the most famous Jedi.

Have you ever wondered why Jar Jar was banished at the beginning of the Phantom Menace? Probably not. But if you think about it, Jar Jar never actually says why he was banished. When you initially saw the movie, you probably assumed he did something clumsy. But if you think logically, how could he be so clumsy that his own people banished him?

The truth is that the gungans were so scared of his force powers that they decided to banish him out of fear. If you look closely, you can see that the gungans run away when they see him returning. This small detail must have been added for a reason.

Plus, have you ever wondered why Jar Jar was in front of a moving droid army when you first see him. Even if Jar Jar was stupid, there's no way he would miss an entire army of droids coming towards him. It just isn't possible. It's clear that he was helping command the droids. Either this or he stood there on purpose in order to meet Qui Gon and Obi-Wan and lure them into his trap. If you ask me, none of this could be a coincidence.

Since the animated Clone Wars series takes place in between episode one and two, we are lucky to see more Jar Jar Binks. In season one episode eight, Jar Jar is seen having insane reflexes. These reflexes and quick actions are usually only seen by force users, meaning Jar Jar having such reflexes should be no surprise by now. In that episode you can even see Jar Jar wearing a hood, similar to those of Jedi and Sith. Though the hood is no real evidence, its still a nice easter egg alluding to Jar Jar's true character.

In season one episode twelve, Jar Jar is given the task of saving the Obi-Wan and Anakin. He is strangely successful at this. This would only make sense if Jar Jar was a Sith, and the enemies worked for him. | would assume that the capture and rescue of the Jedi was just an elaborate plan to strengthen their trust. But Jar Jar being so successful doesn't quite prove anything.

Furthermore, each Clone Wars episode ends with an insightful quote which relates to the plot. The quote at the end of episode twelve is:

"Fail with honor rather than succeed with fraud."

To the blind viewer, this quote would seem completely unrelated to the episode. But the quote always relate to the episode, why would there be an exception? This is because the quote is actually referring to Jar Jar, who had just saved Anakin and Obi Wan from his own army.

You're probably wondering what the actual actor of Jar Jar has to say about this "theory".  When  Ahmed Best was asked about why Jar Jar received a smaller role in the second film, he replied,


"I think George wanted to give the fans what they wanted,”


Which is referring to the fact that everybody hated Jar Jar, and suggests he was originally meant to have a bigger role. Best also said about the theory that, "there's a lot about it that's true". Later on Twitter he said:


“I will say this, it feels really good when the hidden meaning behind the work is seen. No matter how long it takes. #TPM".


Notice how he uses the TPM hashtag (The Phantom Menace), which is the movie where Jar Jar has the biggest role. Considering that this post was made around the timeframe of the theory's birth, there's no doubt that he was talking about Darth Jar Jar.

Probably the most famous Jar Jar quote was made by George Lucas, the creator of Star Wars himself,


"Jar Jar is the key to all this".


This quote was made as he showed what appears to be concept art from the Phantom Menace. Usually, when something is not true it gets denied instantly. The fact that Ahmed Best and George Lucas seem to support the theory, means that is has to be true. There's really no more evidence needed.

Now you probably believe Jar Jar is secretly evil, and he was originally meant to have a bigger part in the second episode. But what part would he have? Well, it's pretty obvious when you think about it. Count Dooku seemed to just come out of nowhere and insert himself into the story. This is because Count Dooku was meant to be Jar Jar, but George Lucas quickly changed the story after Jar Jar received so much hate. Even Count Dooku's ship resembles Jar Jar's face. The landing things are like his ears, the door is like his mouth, and the circular things at the top are his eyes. There are even two dots conveniently placed for a nose.

It has also been mentioned that the prequels are meant to mirror the original trilogy. It would make sense that Jar Jar would be a mirror of Yoda. In the original trilogy, Yoda was the most powerful Jedi, but he was in hiding until the second movie. Jar Jar is a powerful Sith, but would come out of hiding in the second prequel movie. It goes even deeper, because when Luke first met Yoda, Yoda acted silly and clumsy. This ties in perfectly with Jar Jar.

If you still don't believe Jar Jar was meant to have a big role in the second film, think about the fact that Jar Jar had so much screen time in the Phantom Menace. He was in almost every scene. However, in the second film he was hardly seen at all. Why would they put so much work into his character, which takes ages to animate, when he was going to amount to nothing? The only explanation is that originally he was going to be one of the main villains.

Now that the truth has been revealed, all we can do is hope that Darth Jar Jar will make an appearance in one of the upcoming Star Wars films. This probably won't ever happen now that Disney owns Star Wars. Disney is clearly not focused on making high quality films, but rather exploiting the fans to make some quick cash. But after reading this you should be left without a doubt that Jar Jar is a Sith. To still hate on Jar Jar you would have to be very narrow minded, and unable to understand things unless they are presented directly in front of you. There is so much proof, from mind control, force based techniques, quotes from Ahmed Best, and the deaths of thousands of Jedi. Jar Jar was the true villain of the prequels, who we would have loved if only George Lucas didn't care so much about trying to make the fans happy.


Thank you for reading this weeks Watt Report.


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